Famous Quotes a301-a303

a301: A slave has but one master; the ambitious man has as many masters as there are persons whose aid may contribute to the advancement of his fortune.
- La Bruyere.

a302: Our natures are like oil; compound as with anything,
Yet will we strive to swim at the ton.
- Beaumont and Fletcher.

a303: Dreams, indeed, are ambition; for the very substance of the ambitious is merely the shadow of a dream.
And I hold ambition of so airy and light a quality, that it is but a shadow's shadow.
- Shakespreare.

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Love Poems a298-a300

a298: I always thought I was so strong. But here you are destroying me one little piece at a time.. Why do I love you?
- Belle.

a299: I only think of you as a friend" are the most painful words most people hear at least once from someone they truly love.
- Erin Castillo.

a300: I want to be the one you call at 3am,
telling me about the dream you've had.
Talk to me till day breaks in
and all the fears no longer seem bad.
- Miracle whos wings are broken.

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Sexy Text Messages a295-a297

a295: Hear about the nigger who thought he was bleeding to death???
turns out he had diarrhea!!!
- Tom.

a296: Who is a Dickhead’s favorite actress? Courtney Cocks.
- Joe.

a297: What do you say when you see Micheal Jackson at the beach?
Get out of my son!!!
- Candice.

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Love Poems a292-a294

a292: Scary is a love that goes wrong then someone dies on the inside and out, then their soul dies all together.
- Alexandra Lagalo.

a293: It hurts me inside knowing you have no idea how much I've cried. It's too bad I don't have the guts to tell you.
- Alexandra Lagalo.

a294: You've hurt me countless times
you've betrayed my trust,
you've called me plenty of names,
but i forgive you every time
and somehow i cant stop loving you
- Findingemo.

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Love Poems a289-a291

a289: She snagged you in the end
And it tore me apart
Still, I continued to play pretend
Though all I had was a broken heart.
- silent soliloquy.

a290: I just wanna feel you up with love, i just wanna be close, close to you!
- Stupid Girl.

a291: Loving you is like the sun,bright in the begging and dark in the end.
- bloody kissez.

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Famous Quotes a286-a288

a286: Ambition is a lust that's never quenched,
Grows more inflamed, and madder by enjoyment.
- Otway.

a287: 'Tis a common proof.
That lowliness is young ambition's ladder,
Wherto the climber upwards turns his face,
But when once attains the utmost round,
He then unto the ladder turns his back,
Looks in the clouds, scorning the base degrees
By which he did ascend.
- Shakespreare.

a288: Farewell, a long farewell, to all my greatness!
This is the state of man. To-day he puts forth
The tender leaves of hope; to-morrow blossoms,
And bears his blushing honors thick upon him;
The third day comes a frost, a killing frost.
- Shakespreare.

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Famous Quotes a286-a288

a286: Ambition is a lust that's never quenched,
Grows more inflamed, and madder by enjoyment.
- Otway.

a287: 'Tis a common proof.
That lowliness is young ambition's ladder,
Wherto the climber upwards turns his face,
But when once attains the utmost round,
He then unto the ladder turns his back,
Looks in the clouds, scorning the base degrees
By which he did ascend.
- Shakespreare.

a288: Farewell, a long farewell, to all my greatness!
This is the state of man. To-day he puts forth
The tender leaves of hope; to-morrow blossoms,
And bears his blushing honors thick upon him;
The third day comes a frost, a killing frost.
- Shakespreare.

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Sexy Text Messages a283-a284

a283: What’s the difference between a red necks c*nt and a football?
If you try really really hard you could probably eat a football.
- Roota.

a2854 Once there was a China man and a black man.
They were standing in front of the lake.
The China man skipped a stone across the lake, and the rock made sound... "Ching, Chang, Chong ". The black man was amazed at what he heard.
The China man said,"This is how a remember my ancestry. ie the dynasty of Ching, the dynasty of Chang, and the dynasty of Chong".
The black man wondered what sound he get when skipping a rock to the lake...
So he did, and the sound was "Chimp, Pans, Zee".
- BOSS.

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Joke Of The Day 04/22/08

“Now, that looks like a happily married couple.” Remarks the husband.
“Don’t be too sure, my Dear. They are probable saying the same thing about us.” Replied his wife.

From: Ajokeaday.com # 15883 (received via email)
Author: USA.

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Love Poems a280-a282

a280: No more trouble in my life,
No more tears over you to cry,
No more breaking me inside,
No more hurting me, no more lies.
- sexyCheckers.

a281: Why do you look at me now that I have found someone new? You had your chance, and now it's really over between you and me!
- Chaye.

a282: For someone who has lost a loved one,
Times doesnt always heal the wound.
- sexyCheckers.

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Joke Of The Day 04/20/08

After struggling for many hours deep within the forest
of stately hardwoods, the new lumberjack finally quit. He just couldn't hack it.

From: Ajokeaday.com # 18646 (receive via email)
Author: El Cass Hampton Va USA.

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Love Poems a277-a279

a277: I told you I love you,
I never told you a lie.
But you just walked away,
Don't I at least get a goodbye?
- A Lot Like Love.

a278: My love for you is what brought out the bravest soul in me, now I am not at all afraid to enter into a totally different world just to behold those beautiful eyes again.
- Naiza.

a279: Wish i could fly next to you even just to steal one kiss, to make you feel my passion and let you hear my heart's throbbing.
- Naiza.

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Sexy Text Messages a274-a276

a274: What did the egg say to the boiling pot of water?
It might take me awhile to get hard...I just got laid last night.
- Marisa.

a275: 3 women go to the doctors for a pap smear one day.

The gynecologist asks the 1st woman "why do you want a pap smear?"
She replies, "I think I might have cervical cancer." She goes into the room and has her pap smear, and the gynecologist comes out after he’s finished.

He then asks the 2nd woman why she wants a pap smear. She replies, "Just having a check-up." So she goes into the room to have hers.

After he’s finished with the 2nd woman he asks the 3rd woman why she wants a pap smear. She replies, "Because my sex life is f**king boring."
- Sicko.

a276: Why did Britney spears shave her head? because she wanted the drapes to match the carpet.
- joe.

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Love Poems a271-a273

a271: Do you know what heart is? Heart is the only thing that is broken, but still working.
- Glenn.

a272: The best and most beautiful things in this world cannot be seen or even heard, but must be felt with the heart.
- Chanti.

a273: The cracks in my heart are not the sighn of weakness; but the scars that show i survived the battle.
- Amena.

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Sexy Text Messages a268-a270

a268: Guy walks into a wh*re house and says "I am a virgin and I need to have sex like NOW" The manager says "Well we have a policy that everyone has to have some practice before we send you in... there is a tree outside with a notch hole in it go bang on that for an hour or two come back in and we’ll set you up" So the guy runs out bangs on the tree for a little while. He goes back in and says "K I am ready!"
The lady nods and and points him where he needs to go. He goes in the room and a chick was waiting naked for him. A couple of minutes go by and the manager hears this awful bloody scream, so She runs in the room and says "WHAT THE F*CK ARE YOU DOING?" The guy has a broom handle shoved up the chicks ass and He replies "... Checkin for bees!"
- Tiffany.

a269: Two guys hear about this whore house in Texas. It’s the best wh*re house in the world they hear, so they take a week off of work, and road trip down there. When they get there, one of them realizes that he forgot his wallet. He asks his buddy for some cash and he says
"sorry bro, I’m gettin all the p*ssy I can get for my money."
So he searches all over his car, and finally finds 65 cents. He goes to the owner of the wh*re house and explains his situation. The owner says
"I tell you what, there is this old lady on the top floor who has been begging me to get back into it, you can have her all night long for 65 cents." The guys figures f*ck it, old p*ssy is better than no p*ssy at all, so he gives the owner his 65 cents and goes to the top floor. He starts to f*ck this lady and about half way through he says
"You know this is alright, but its kinda dry"
"Oh I know just how to fix that" the old women says as she goes into the bathroom. She comes out a few minutes later, and they start to f*ck again. The guy says "Oh my god this is amazing! What did you do?"
"Oh I just peeled off the old scabs."
- Ryan.

a270: A man who hadn’t had a date in years, suddenly found himself in luck. This sexy, voluptuous brunette had agreed to go to the movies with him Friday night. But he was in a panic because his d*ck was only 3 inches long when erect, and if he ever scored with this beautiful woman, she would probably laugh at him and walk out the door. So... he went to his doctor and pleaded with him to give him something. The doc said take one of these pills every two hours and everything will be fine. Just before he was going to leave the house to pick up his date, he decided to take all ten pills at once because he was so desperate. Within minutes, he felt his penis go down his pants leg and onto the floor! What was he going to do?! A quick thinker, he tied his penis as a necktie and put on a sportcoat. While in the dark theater, his hot date cuddled up next to him and started stroking his tie. While she was doing this she kept saying over and over, "I love your tie! I love your tie!" It wasn’t long before a man ’s voice came over the speaker system shouting, "Will the couple in the front row quit throwing ice cream on the screen?!?!"
- Mark W.

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Love Poems a265-a267

a265: To see a rainbow u gotta go through rain.
To see love u gotta go through pain.
- Amena.

a266: If loving you is the foolest thing to do, then i would rather be a foolish than loving someone else.
- Shella Faye.

a267: Love is not finding a perfect person, It is seeing an imperfect person perfectly.
- Amena.

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Sexy Text Messages a262-a264

a262: So three men are drinking in a car. They get pulled over by a female cop, who comes up to the side window. They roll down the window, and she says "I’ll let you three go free if you all together add up to 21 inches." So the driver pulls his pants down. 10 inches. The man in the passenger seat pulls his pants down. 10 inches. The man in the back seat pulls his pants down, and he’s only one measly inch. However, they do in fact add up to 21 inches so they get to go free. As they’re driving down the road the man with the one inch dick says "THANK GOD I POPPED A BONER BACK THERE GUYS!"
- Fonz.

a263: Q: what is the speed of sex?
A: 68, because if you go 69 you flip over and eat it
- Carly 4Schorr.

a264: Q: Where would someone give head on an airplane?
A: The cockpit.
- Angelica.

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Love Poems a259-a261

a259: I hate it when you fall in love with someone and then you're expected to leave them be and let them go
- Erin.

a260: It's amazing how someone can break your heart, and you can still love them with all the little pieces.
- tinker bel.

a261: What's the point of love if you're not loved?.
- Sarah.

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Love Poems a256-a258

a256: Let the sun shine over us,
As we stare into the eyes of our lives,
Say those 3 little words,
That mean so much,
And get carried away,
By the angels of heaven,
To be together, Forever...
- EmmaJade.

a257: When you told me you'll love me forever...i wonder how long that forever actually means. Because the people who say forever usually leave the fastest.
- mine.

a258: Why is it difficult to let go of the past? Because there's a part in us that wishes to rewrite history, to give it one more shot and maybe, to have the happy ending that we deserve.
- Richmond.

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Sexy Text Messages a253-a255

a253: A man is convicted of a white collar crime and is sentenced to 20 years in prison. This is a serious problem for this man because he’s not exactly cut out for prison life, but he’s going.
The guard walks him down the corridor and they stop in front of a cell with the door open. He looks inside and sees a huge, ugly man in there. The guard pushes him in and slams the door behind him.

The man sits on the bed across from the huge ugly man. The huge ugly man says "seeing how we gonna be in the same cell for the next 20 years, one of us is gonna have to be the momma and one of us is gonna have to be the pappa, I’m gonna let you decide."
The new prisoner says "well sir, I definitely think I would prefer to be the pappa." The huge ugly man says; "Well alright then - get over here and suck mommas d*ck."
- Casey.

a254: Q: What do you get when you cross a rooster with a turkey?
A: A woman.
Still don’t get it? Where else would you find a c*ck gobbler?
- Scott.

a255: A black man walks into the bar and sits down next to a gay man not knowing that he’s gay. A few drinks later the gay man says, "If you come into the back room with me, I’ll give you a bl*wjob." He gets up and walks into the back room.

A few minutes later, the black man goes to the back room and proceeds to beat the gay man within and inch of his life.
When he gets back to the barstool, the bartender asks "Why did you do that?"
"Well," says the black man, "he said something about a job"
- Suki.

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Famous Quotes a249-a252

a249: -ambition, idly vain;
Revenge and malice swell her train.
- Penrose.

a250: Vaulting ambition which o'erleaps itself.
- Shakespreare.

a251: What's all the gaudy glitter of a crown?
What but the glaring meteor of ambition,
That leads the wretch benighted in his errors,
Points to the gulf and shines upon destruction?
- Brooke.

a252: Who soars too near the sun, with golden wings,
Melts them; to ruin his own fortune brings.
- Shakespreare.

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Love Poems a246-a248

a246: Theres nothing I wouldn't do for you,
No place how far wherever you are;
I'll always love you.
You will be in my heart forever.
No one could ever take you away from me, because you will be in my heart forever.
- Renee.

a247: He Would Never Leave,
He Could Never Leave.
I Love Him So And He Knows,
And Someday I Find Myself;
Not Knowing Anyone .
I Cried And Cried What A Shame.
I Thought I Loved Him And He Loved Me.
- Noha.

a248: Love is finding someone that can endure the pain you will put each other through.
- ESN.

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Love Poems a243-a245

a243: What you and i shared was special, and to this day those feelings still remain. And although my dad has kept us apart for so long, i know that no matter what, the love we share will be strong.
- Amber Justine.

a244: Love is the best gift you can have in your life, so live life with lots of love and you'll have the best life you'll ever dream of.
- Kou Xiong.

a245: All this time I've been looking for love ,trying to make things work that werent good enough, till i thought im through, said im done then stumbled into the arms of the one.
- Lady in Pain.

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Sexy Text Messages a240-a242

a240: A man wants to get a $100 bill tattooed on his crotch. He says he wants it because he likes big money, he likes to handle money and the next time his wife wants to blow $100 they can just stay home.
- Centerville.

a241: There was a cowboy and a baptist minister riding on a plane. The flight attendant came up to the cowboy and asked sir would you like something to drink? perhaps a softdrink, juice, or how about a nice ice cold beer! The cowboy then said "why yes mam an ice cold beer sure would go down right smooth i reckon." Then she turned to the baptist minister and said how about you pastor would you like a beer also, to that the baptist minister said "mam I would rather be stripped naked, beaten, and ridden by a wh*re! Than to allow the juice of sin to touch my lips! The cowboy then said mam you can have my beer back I didn’t realize there was a second option!
- Dan Mercer.

a242: What’s the difference between Ronald McDonald and John Wayne Gacy?
Ronald McDonald doesn’t show you the ropes!
Ronald McDonald cooks his meat!
Ronald McDonald doesn’t keep old meat in the basement!
- Jem.

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Sexy Text Messages a237-a239

a237: Hurry, hold me b4 i shatter.
hurry! run b4 you're scarred.
Hurry, save me b4 I'm lost forever.
hurry! save yourself b4 i pull u under.
- Unknown.

a238: Q: What do you get when you cross a rooster with a turkey?
A: A woman.
Still don’t get it? Where else would you find a cock gobbler?
- Scott.

a239: A black man walks into the bar and sits down next to a gay man not knowing that he’s gay. A few drinks later the gay man says, "If you come into the back room with me, I’ll give you a blow-job." He gets up and walks into the back room.
A few minutes later, the black man goes to the back room and proceeds to beat the gay man within and inch of his life.
When he gets back to the barstool, the bartender asks "Why did you do that?"
"Well," says the black man, "he said something about a job..."
- Suki.

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Love Poems a234-a236

a234: It's too the point; being without you totally destroys me
But being with you breaks me into little tiny pieces,
I just have to figure out which one hurts more.
- BrokenInside.

a235: It's sad to see you holding her hand. However sad it might be It's truly funny for me. Every glance you give me when walking with her. Every night you'd drether be talking to me instead of her. And every day I see a little bit of my love die for you.
- Final Breath.

a236: I'm a nervous wreck now that you're gone.
Truthfully, the only time I was safe was in your arms.
- Miriam.

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Love Poems a231-a233

a231: I could kiss 10000 different guys, but it still wouldn't mean half as much as it does just to hold your hand.
- Brandi.

a232: It's painful if the only person you adore most tells you to move away and find someone better for you. Know for a fact that you already found the best.
- Rain05.

a233: Giving up on love doesn't mean moving on. It's giving up your happiness.
- Reaper.

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Joke Of The Day 04/05/08

While taxiing at London Gatwick, the crew of a US Air flight departing for Ft. Lauderdale made a wrong turn and came nose to nose with a United 727. An irate female ground controller lashed out at the US Air crew, screaming: "US Air 2771, where the hell are you going! I told you to turn right onto Charlie taxiway! You turned right on Delta! Stop right there.

I know it's difficult for you to tell the difference between 'C' and 'D', but get it right!" Continuing her rage to the embarrassed crew, she was now shouting hysterically: "God! Now you've screwed everything up! It'll take forever to sort this out! You stay right there and don't move till I tell you to! You can expect progressive taxi instructions in about half an hour, and I want you to go exactly where I tell you, when I tell you, and how I tell you! You got that, US Air 2771?" "Yes ma'am," the humbled crew responded.

Naturally, the ground control communications frequency fell terribly silent after the verbal bashing of US Air 2771. Nobody wanted to chance engaging the irate ground controller in her current state of mind. Tension in every cockpit out in Gatwick was definitely running high. Just then an unknown pilot broke the silence and keyed his microphone, asking: "Wasn't I married to you once?"

From: Ajokeaday.com # 10641 (receive via email)
Author: USA.

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Love Poems a228-a230

a228: And i don't care if we're arguing or giving each other the silent treatment just so long as we're in the same room thats all i need to be able to look over and see you.
- AMiLOSTorJustLessFOUND.

a229: Sometimes we get too possessive of things we don't even own,
it's a side effect of loving too much, but receiving too little.
- Rain05.

a230: Save your tears, you can't cry the pain away.
Save your breath, you can't scream away the hurt.
Save your heart, you can't keep on loving him.
- Life is borin.

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Sexy Text Messages a225-a227

a225: S*x is like McDonalds, I’m loving it!
P*ssy is like subway, Eat Fresh!
D*ck is like Gatorade, Is it in you?
This joke is like an STD, so spread it!
- Ashley.

a226: I had an uncle who was jailed for his beliefs.
He believed he could m*sturbate on the bus.
- Allan Burt.

a227: Q: What is the definition of a birth control pill?
A: The other thing a woman can put in her mouth to keep from getting pregnant!
- Michael Rock.

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Joke Of The Day 04/04/08

An 85-year-old widow went on a blind date with a 90-year-old man.
When she returned to her daughter's house later that night, she seemed upset.
"What happened, Mother?" the daughter asked.
"I had to slap his face three times!"
"You mean he got fresh?"
"No," she answered. "I thought he was dead!"

From: Ajokeaday.com # 2690 (receive via email)
Author: USA.

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Sexy, Dirty and Funny

OMG!!! What a... just see view the video.



WTF!!! Laugh Out Loud!

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Sexy Text Messages a222-a224

a222: I love the way you make me feel when we're together.

a223: The passion we share together just leaves me wanting one thing… more!

a224: I want to make love to you every minute of every day.

From: A Friend (receive via email)
Author: Unknown.

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Joke Of The Day 04/02/08

What did the bee say to the flower?
“Hey bud, when do you open?

From: Ajokeaday.com # 10230 (receive via email)
Author: USA.

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Love Poems a219-a221

a219: Some times its hard not to fall in love, but at the same time you cant really help it but to follow your heart.
- Suleika.

a220: Why hide our feeling,
Why lie to that special some one
Its lying and keeping your emotions from the one you love the key to happiness, if some why am i so unhappy.
- Suleika.

a221: Love is sometimes hard to find, but I know and you know that there is someone out there for us. May it be a friend or someone you just meet that person is out there for you or me.
- Victoria.

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Joke Of The Day 04/01/08

Teacher: What are the four main food groups?
Students: Canned, frozen, instant, and lite.

From: Ajokeaday.com # 18149 (receive via email)
Author: USA.

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