Sexy Text Messages a378-a380

a378: You know those types of girls that are ugly-gnarly but the only thing that they have going for them are a set of huge bosom? There it is.

God was feeling a bit worn out, after all creating the entire universe and earth is a big task so he decided he would turn over the task of creating a new batch of humans to an apprentice. The apprentice was not that bright so God left simple instructions, just make them look like Adam and Eve. So the apprentice went off to work and started creating sculptures to be made real. God came back later and got ticked. What the deuce is this?! I told you to make humans! these are hairer than that monkey you made for me last week! the only thing he’s good for is a loofah! Okay, this is the last time I’m fixing your mistakes! And with that, God zapped the sculpture, causing 2 large mountains to protrude from the chest. And God then said, ’Good, let there be titties.’
- The Rock.

a379: What’s the definition of agony?

Sliding down a 20 foot razor blade, using your balls as brakes.
- Eml.

a380: Donald Duck walked into a drugstore and asked for a packet of condoms.

"Certainly, sir," said the lady behind the counter. "Shall I put them on your bill?"

"No way!" replied Donald Duck. "What do you think I am, a d*ckhead?"
- misskim.