Funny Jokes 081608

1. I went into the gas station today and asked for five dollars worth of gas.....

The clerk farted and gave me a receipt

2. Steve is going on an ocean cruise, and he tells his doctor that, he's worried about getting real seasick.
The doctor tells him, "Just eat two pounds of stewed tomatoes before you leave the dock."
Steve says, "Will that keep me from getting sick?"
The doctor says,"No, but it'll look real pretty in the water."

3. Q: What's the best thing about turning 65?
A: No more calls from insurance salesmen.